Growing up with cerebral palsy: letter to my 7-year old self
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Growing up with cerebral palsy: a letter to my 7-year old self
Chloe Tearβs words to her 7-year old self on growing up with cerebral palsy: βtry your hardest and never think you cannot achieve something.β
Dear Chloe,
Youβre currently 7 years old and are about to embark on a journey of a lifetime. This journey will show you the world in a completely new light, it will show you things you never thought you would see, and allow you to meet people you might otherwise have never met. Unfortunately, this journey is tough, it will test you past the limits you thought you had and cause so much frustration and upset- but you are capable of overcoming this, you can find tremendous joy in every aspect of your life.
You have just been diagnosed withΒ mild cerebral palsy.
You have never heard of this, and have no idea what it is! But donβt worry- mumβs done lots of research and has your back! These hospital appointments may seem strange, and unnecessary as you donβt think anything is wrong, but it will all become clear with time.
Ever wondered why you walk on your toes and fall over more than your friends? Ever wondered why you canβt hop, struggle with maths, and feel tired? Or have you ever thought about why your left leg feels tighter or hurts in ways you canβt quite explain yet?
I guess these are things that youβve never really thought about- they are just normal!
The physiotherapist will make you a splint to wear on your leg, Iβm afraid you wonβt like the casting process and the physio will forget to put a pattern on it. When you turn up to the appointment to pick up yourΒ AFO splintΒ you donβt know what to expect. You may not be happy that itβs plain white, but this means that your friends get to put stickers on it instead- this will become a very fond memory. Unfortunately, shoes and splints are a nightmare.
I know you love all things girly and just want to wear nice shoes like everyone else. Just please try and not get too upset (or throw too many pairs of trainers across the shop) you get your dream pair of βpretty shoesβ in the form of pink sandals that you love, and get some lovely brogues when you are older. Shoes like everyone else feels like the most important thing right now, but this isnβt always the case.
People arenβt always the nicest. They may call you names and push you over. Theyβll make fun of the way you walk and say things that make you feel completely inferior. GettingΒ bullied for somethingΒ you have no control over is the worst thing in the world and Iβm sorry. Iβm sorry for all the times youβve not felt good enough. Iβm sorry for all the times youβve felt less of a person because you have a disability. No one deserves that and it certainly is not true! There will be times where you wish you didnβt have cerebral palsy, it can feel like itβs getting in the way and be nothing but trouble.
Β Your family wonβt let the bullies win. Theyβll sort things out and be there to pick up the pieces. They will teach you to laugh and joke. Youβll laugh through the tears and realize all the funny things about having cerebral palsy. You will joke about yourselfΒ because sometimes itβs hilarious that you fell over NOTHING- how is that even possible?! They will teach you to be open about having cerebral palsy and that it doesnβt mean youβre less capable of achieving anything. Your family will support any dream you have, even if your first career idea is to be an air hostess. Can you really see me walking up and down an aisle pouring drinks during turbulence?
Needless to say, growing up with cerebral palsy, you figure out a career path that is logistically possible!
As you continue up throughΒ primary school you may find things tough. Maths is never your strongest point, you have no idea about the 6-8 times tables, and despite being told that βpractice makes perfectβ unfortunately you never figure this out. However, this doesnβt stop you from getting a B in maths at GCSE! Youβll get taken out of the classroom to work on telling the time. You will stare at this clock and not have a clue what time it says! You will start high school and still not really be able to tell the time, relying on digital clocks. Despite this, it slowly sinks in, even if this means having to work it out every time you look at your watch and 24-hour time still makes absolutely no sense. Education can be very tricky at times, yet I can reassure you that hard work does pay off, you even end up studying psychology at university.

"Growing up with cerebral palsy meant putting yourself out there and grabbing every opportunity."
Β
When youβre 15 years old you will choose to do an amazing thing. Itβs something that will change your life and give you hope. You will start a blog and realize your passion for writing, even if it takes months to get the hang of it all. You will connect with people all around the world who have cerebral palsy and learn so much about your own condition. Getting to know others with cerebral palsy will be a massive part of your support network and friendship group.
These people will give you the confidence that being you is more than okay. It will create some of the best friendships that I am sure will last a lifetime. By learning more about cerebral palsy it will mean that you can support others with the disability and reassure parents along the way. Writing will help you to process the changes in health as you get older, it will also give you more confidence.
Make sure you complete your bronze Duke of Edinburgh Award because it will be one of the best things ever! Go on that canoe trip and complete the NCS Programme that is packed full of outdoor activities. You may not be able to do hopscotch when youβre in primary school but this does not mean a zip wire is impossible. Please agree to help in the school production, it will be the highlight of your year and be great fun. Just go out there and grab every opportunity.
You may be all shy and quiet now, but this will change in Sixth Form. By learning more about your disability and being open about it will give you the confidence to be yourself. Believe it or not, youβll apply to be Head Girl. You will figure out that you actually enjoy public speaking.
Medical professionalsΒ will always be there and give you so much advice. Some of it will be useful and some of it may not be. Being given a booklet that says you need to βaccept painβ will not be helpful in the slightest, just remember these people donβt actually experience what you go through. On the other hand, they do know some things. Growing up with cerebral palsy you may hate those physio exercises you have to do every day, why would you want to do something that causes you more pain? However, they work, stick with them and you will thank yourself in the future.
When medical professionals mention the idea of a wheelchair when youβre older, please donβt shut this idea out completely. I know youβre stubborn (in a good way) and just want to carry on being independent, but you can, just in a slightly different way. You may hate your chair at the beginning, seeing it as a symbol of defeat. However, try to see it as giving you more energy and less pain, it even means you can go out more and not be as tired! Different medical equipmentΒ isnβt meant to stop you from doing things- it is there to allow you to continue doing the things you love.
Go and enjoy things. Try new things that may seem a little βimpossibleβ and enjoy the learning process. Donβt worry about what other people will think, I know how hard this can be at times. Be okay with being you, but also try not to put too much pressure on yourself. You will be amazed how you can adapt to new challenges over time but youβre allowed to admit that this can be hard. Be patient with yourself.
Chloe, my advice to you as you are growing up with cerebral palsy is to try your hardest and never think you cannot achieve something. Be certain about your goals, but flexible in how you get there. Remember to believe in yourself and laugh along the way. It may be hard at times but amazing things do happen!

"For me, growing up with cerebral palsy meant participating fully in school activities."
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βGrowing up with cerebral palsy: letter to my 7-year old selfΒ β has been republished fromΒ Life as a Cerebral PalsyΒ student with Chloeβs kind permission.
Read more:Β How to ask someone about their illness?

Chloe Tear
Chloe Tear is the creator of 'Life as a Cerebral Palsy student.' From the age of fifteen, she raised disability awareness and been involved with numerous advocacy campaigns run by various organizations.
Caption:
Growing up with cerebral palsy you will be amazed how you can adapt to new challenges over time but you're allowed to admit that this can be hard. Be patient with yourself.