I am an incomplete paraplegic, and I peed myself on a date. This isn’t anything to be ashamed of: accidents happen. And I am okay with that.
Dating with incontinence: the backstory
Before I get to the juicy bit, some backstory. I’m classified as an incomplete paraplegic. I use a wheelchair and deal with incontinence issues, among other things that come with my conditions, daily.
In the weeks leading up to the date, I had been talking with this really sweet guy on a popular dating app. When our schedules finally matched up, we agreed to meet for breakfast.
The restaurant was busy and the food was seriously good, but we were pretty much rushed out of there so other guests could sit down. Since things went well and we wanted to keep talking, we met for a drink at a local LGBT resort/bar. Some great conversations followed, and I was having a great time!
The moment I realized I’d peed myself
Before we knew it, I had to leave for work. He insisted on walking me to my car, which would have been cool except I had a feeling something was up with my underwear situation.
Now, it was a bright, hot, sunny day and I had light grey pants on… meaning every detail of my outfit was visible, down to the stray white dog hair on my shirt I’d missed with the lint roller.
As I prepared to transfer to my car, I stealthily brushed a hand under my bottom and… WET! I couldn’t believe it. I had peed myself on a date!
So here I am, talking with this guy while trying to hide a GIANT wet spot on my pants. Mid-transfer, he offers to help and walks closer to me. So now I’m really freaking out because I didn’t want to launch into the whole “I’m incontinent and wear products for that instead of traditional briefs or boxers” conversation with someone I just met.
Thankfully, I hastily got in my car and said my goodbyes through the window. I don’t know if he ever saw it. If he did notice, then a huge thank you to him for not saying anything, because wow, was that embarrassing enough without any added commentary!
Embarrassing? Yes. Something to be ashamed of? No.
Incontinence isn’t anything to be ashamed of, and accidents happen. When and how they happen, though, can definitely be mortifying!
Sometimes I’ve just got to laugh and say, “Yep, I peed myself.”
First published July 25, 2019. Edited for clarity and accessibility October 1, 2026. This is Jordyn’s personal experience.
